Giving in to the Fear.


I’m a bit of a scaredy cat. And definitely an “over-thinker”. I’ll look at an ordinary situation and imagine it in its worst possible scenario. I went out to an underground club a few weeks ago and made all my friends dance by the fire exit, as I couldn’t stop thinking about not being able to get out of there in an emergency. Health, too – I’m a huge hypochondriac, I’ll admit it. If I thought about it enough I’d probably never leave the house! If I had to choose something, though, I’d say my biggest fear was probably flying. I can’t stand it. I’ve embarrassed myself on too many flights by descending into a nervous wreck following the slightest change in engine noise, a light flashing, an air hostess answering the phone – don’t even mention turbulence. I know exactly why it is, too. It’s having a complete lack of control and entrusting my life to a giant metal machine hurtling through the sky at 500mph.

In January this year, the chance to visit Kenya with a few of my best girl friends came up. One had been out in Kenya for a few months volunteering at the Colobus Trust, and so the plan was to go and stay with her when she finished her work and travel for a few weeks. I was a bit apprehensive about going at first – it would involve two 8 hour flights (Heathrow to Nairobi) and then two internal flights too (Nairobi to Mombasa).

But then I thought, how amazing would this experience be? And to be able to spend the money on it, before I get a mortgage and a family and a permanent job and all that kind of stuff. My friends would have gone whether I had or not, and I would have been sitting at home in rainy Birmingham wishing I’d been able to face that 8 hour flight. So I decided to man up and get on with it, and go.

(Although before I sound too brave I should admit that my doctor prescribed me some Diazepam for the flights…..)

Anyway, it turned out to be an amazing couple of weeks. We visited Nairobi, had a 2 night safari in Tsavo West and Amboselli, stayed in a cottage by the Indian ocean in Mombasa and went snorkelling – I touched a puffa fish!!

So I guess the moral of the story is that it’s ok (and very normal) to be afraid of something – as long as you don’t give in to the fear and let it stop you from doing what you want to do.

And my next flight? Well, it’s in 3 days time, Birmingham to Paris. Bring it on.


Can you have fun with horses in the snow?

So it’s been snowing again!! Virtually non-stop since last Thursday evening and then over the weekend, which was a bit of a pain as I had my second interview for the marketing job on Friday morning so had to drive to the other side of Birmingham not only in rush hour traffic but also in the snow – I’d been driving for 20 minutes and was still within walking distance of my house!

The latest onslaught of snow has come at a pretty inconvenient time (aside from the fact it’s the end of March and that this time last year we were sitting in a park in Manchester in the sun). I’ve only just started to get Bailey back into work after his colic issues, as he obviously had to have time off to recover from that and as soon as I started exercising him again he had a terrible cough, so it’s only been in the last week that I’ve moved on from light hacking and into schooling work. So the snow has buggered up my schooling schedule a bit.

But in a way, it’s actually been quite nice. It was snowing when I got to the yard yesterday and so I knew I couldn’t really ride (we have no indoor school) but I was also really conscious about horsey being in the stable all day and night – horses recovering from colic should have time exercising daily if possible, to keep their gut moving. So I decided to get his big outdoor rug on and get him to stretch his legs in the school. The best (and most fun!) way to do this? Run around with him!

Sorry for the poor quality video – I take all my stuff with my iPhone, and this is the first video I’ve put online with it. It was perfect quality on my phone but something’s obviously got lost along the way. I’ll work on it!!!

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Anyway it’s been over a week now since the snow arrived and it’s still hanging round – fingers crossed it disappears soon! Hope no one else has had any horsey snow related problems.

A walk in the snow

When it started to snow last night, my mum immediately started to get worried about how she was going to get to work this morning. She works in the countryside and her car is terrible in the snow. So, she asked if she could borrow my car, which is much better on the icethan hers and so would be safer for her to drive to work. I obviously said yes but that left me in the house without a car today, feeling a little bit stranded!! I’ve been job hunting over the last few weeks and received either no response or just rejections, so the thought of another day alone in my house trawling the internet for vacancies didn’t seem very appealing.

So seeing as I couldn’t go very far I decided to go out for a little walk. Our house backs on to a golf course and when it’s snowy it provides such a beautiful, peaceful space to go for a walk in. Like a park, but without all the other people. It’s amazing what some time to yourself can do for you, and I came back feeling much more relaxed and positive about my situation.









An Autumn Day at the Cow and Calf

Had a lovely weekend this weekend, Johnny and I went up to Leeds to celebrate my old housemate Alex’s birthday. It was really great to see her and everyone else, but it did make me miss being at Uni!! Took a few photos over the weekend so here they are:

Took this one on Friday afternoon as I was walking along, no particular relevance except to note that it’s already Autumn! Love the colours of the leaves in Autumn but it is quite depressing to think that the days are only going to get darker and colder over the next few months!

Went for a walk with Johnny and the girls at the Cow and Calf in Ilkley on Saturday, which was absolutely freezing and really boggy aswell – my boots got soaked through and I had to wear a pair of Johnny’s trainers for the rest of the day (which are 4 sizes too big!!). Took this picture of Nancy reading a plaque at the top of the hill, the views are awesome.

The rocks at the Cow and Calf are really great to climb on, and you can see for miles on a clear day like this. This is Johnny on one of the larger rocks, the blue sky is deceiving as it really was bitterly cold.

Some of the rocks had names and dates carved into them – this one was from 1852!

Lastly, a shot of the birthday girl looking at all the inscriptions. I hope she had a great weekend. 🙂 xx